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This will be a heck of a lot better than catching up at funerals...


Ok, so my 20th high school reunion is coming up. A couple of months ago I wrote about running into some high school people. Well, one of them just forwarded the info. And of course, it’s at Classmates.com which is an evil little website.

Why evil? Basically, you can’t do much beyond getting a list of names of people who are registered. If you click on the names to read their bios or see their pics you get this message:

Can't get a certain someone off your mind, Gordon?
Go Gold now to get back in touch.


Dear Homecoming Queen,* I’ve been in love with you since 1984 but have finally worked up the nerve to tell you. I’m only a cheesemonger, but I offer my undying devotion to the romantic image I made up about you and have been embellishing for 20 years. Please write back!

Yeah, that’ll work.

Anyways, in a drunken moment at a bar last year, I promised co-worker and attendee of the same high school, [livejournal.com profile] ctrhotpink, that we would go together. This is what people mean when they talk about making Bad Decisions under the influence of alcohol. I regret it now, but a promise is a promise. [livejournal.com profile] ilipodscrill what do you think about being our driver and bodyguard?

Anyway, here are some choice examples of why I’m so excited. These are all actual quotes from the RSVP list:


Can we have it somewhere a little more exciting than McInnis Park golf center?
The last reunion I heard about, the 5th year, was already charging $75 a head. I can only imagine how high the price would be if it was someplace "exciting".


What kind of music would you like to hear at the reunion? Phill Collins, some reggae,
Well, the memories would come flooding back.

Been thinking about the reunion for a few months now.
What possesses someone to start thinking about the reunion months ahead of time? Heck, since the reunion isn’t until September so I guess I am. But I was forced into it. Also this was posted last November or so, so this person has been eagerly awaiting the reunion for over a year.

I look forward to coming to see my (very) old California Friends. Its in my calendar and look forward to flying there from my home in Europe. Ciao
Did I tell you about my home in Europe? Hmmmmm?

The only difference is now we know how to really party.
This just scares me. I hope he doesn’t bring the beer bong.

What kind of music would you like to hear at the reunion? A bunch of hammered 40 year old Karaoke singers (meaning us) sounds good, so we can pretend we are still in high school! I thought I was kidding, but it sounds kind of fun... Still a little joker I am!
Making a serious comment and trying to pass it off like a wacky joke. I bet they are the star of their local karaoke bar and want to show off their special skill.

And the comment that really makes me want to attend:

Can not wait to see the MILFS....
That's a guy I can't wait to party with!


See, the problem is that I don’t love or hate my high school classmates, really. I just feel massive ambivalence about the ones I’m not in touch with. I think the whole experience will be lots of fakey-fakey about how great things were and how we all miss each other.

Anyways, I should probably make up some good lies to tell at the reunion. Any ideas? Anyone got reunion stories?



*heh, the homecoming queen actually reads this journal sometimes so let me say that this is meant to be an example of, not actual, declaration of romantic love. Of course, our homecoming queen was a little punky, photographer who went on to double major in English and Physics at a hoitier-toitier school than mine.
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