Valencia Street terror alert

I was walking down Valencia St. on Sunday. A man got out of his SUV and power walked down the street in front of me. He had a tight office-plaid shirt on, definitely not cowboy-plaid or retro-grunge-plaid shirt. It was buttoned to the top despite the rare, hot San Francisco day. I remember it was hot because I was going to a housewarming party where I wouldn’t know anyone and I was self-conscious about my own sweat stains. The fact that he drove an SUV has nothing to do with this anecdote.

He stopped for the red light at the corner in front of the pet food hair salon. He looked hurried and uncomfortable. He didn’t like waiting for the green but he didn’t seem torn by his wait, just annoyed. I know I don’t really know what he was thinking. But he didn’t tap his fingers on his belt or swivel his head seeing if the other light was yellow yet. No cars were coming.

A bike messenger dude approached the light. He didn’t have a bike, but his clothes were faded and worn like a messenger, not a hipster. And he had a Zo bag. He had to push past Mr. Plaid ever so slightly to jaywalk and as he did he gave him some advice.

"If you stop for red lights, the terrorists have already won."

Now, here’s the question: are we tired of this punch line yet?