Let sales live long and prosper!

[gordonzola]

This is one of the many reasons I love trade magazines. This is from "Specialty Food Magazine".

Help! Alien cheese terrines are attacking!!!


But really, it's the tag line that gets me. What would Leonard Nimoy say to this?

Comments

[ayodele.livejournal.com]

leicester red? is it any good?

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

That's not the point!

ha. but no, it's not usually. Some Red Leicester is good, much is mild and overpriced (as are most English cheeses in the USA). It's not bad either, mind you, just I'd rather have a cheaper domestic orange cheddar for the price. Clawson makes some really good cheeses (Blue Stilton, for example. not as good as Colston Basset, but better than many Stilton producers) but they are also responsible for all those "white" stiltons with "fruit" too. yuck.

[boysname.livejournal.com]

That's ugly

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

that's why i love the trade publications. they let the ugly shine.

[boysname.livejournal.com]

Ha Ha - they do, don't they. They embrace it, god love 'em

[substitute.livejournal.com]

I love the part at the beginning where the good little cheese roars across the screen pursued by the huge evil cheese and there are all those mozzarella bolts flying around

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

hahaha! There should be an animated sequence on the website.

[kest]

hey, a friend of mine is entertaining the idea of making revolutionary advances in vegan cheese, but needs to know more about cheesemaking in general. got anyone I can point him at?

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

hahahahaha!

making cheese has nothing to do with making vegan "cheese". Someone from Kraft might be able to help because vegan cheese is most similar to American processed cheese.

[(Anonymous)]

please see 'revolutionary advances'. :P (That, and I'm not in a position to judge what he actually does or doesn't need; I'm only going on what he said.)

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

I don't know if that was you posuing anonymously, but have him call me at work if you want. I can point him in the right direction if he's serious and if it won't burn my bridges by sending him to someone else.

[kneidlach.livejournal.com]

they need to fire their marketing person.

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

Hater!

[ammonoid.livejournal.com]

Thats..like a marketing no-no. They're mixing up their sci-fi! 2001 and star trek? They should have used the logs as a monolith.

[constintina.livejournal.com]

This ad is confused in so many ways. what's up with the whole "landing" theme? The design is wretched. If this was a challenge on the apprentice, dude would be fired.

[missruckus.livejournal.com]

ew, i hate red leicester. :(

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

hee hee. That you have an opinion on that just proves the English influence on your country.

[missruckus.livejournal.com]

:P

actually, i tasted the stuff when i was living in the UK - it was naaaasty :)
i don't think i've seen it here, but i'm also not a big cheese person.

[sparkle-shortz.livejournal.com]

God, your friends are so humorless. I think this ad fucking ROOLZ.

I'm going to blast off into space on a Cheeto now.

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

using Cheez Whiz for propulsion?

[felicks.livejournal.com]

OK, so I have a brilliant idea; Today at Longs Rutabaga was looking at a bottle of chocolate milk (with deep love and fascination) and said "It's chocolate cheese!"

Someone has got to produce chocolate cheese! Has it been done? Could we use the Ween album in some sort of bizarre promo events?

[dairryiere.livejournal.com]

One cheesemaker sells chocolate hearts around valentines day every year.

[dairryiere.livejournal.com]

thats chocolate BUTTER hearts.

[plee.livejournal.com]

Wha? How? I'm trying to wrap my head around this.

Not chocolate cheese but related

[paintdrinker.livejournal.com]

Apparently there are a bunch of recipes for chocolate fudge with velveeta as the secret ingredient.

These turn up during my sad and futile web searches for the NON-chocolate cheese fudge of which my childhood memories are made.

[paintdrinker.livejournal.com]

http://www.slashfood.com/2005/07/29/chocolate-cheese/

Can you tell I am enthusiastic about this topic?

[paintdrinker.livejournal.com]

More chocolate cheese references:

http://www.diet-blog.com/archives/2005/08/01/chocolate_flavored_cheese.php
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/section/story.cfm?c_id=3&objectid=10337965

[paintdrinker.livejournal.com]

Don't despair though! You can still be the first to bring it to the states!

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

I may even be visiting this place soon

[paintdrinker.livejournal.com]

*drooling*

[liveavatar.livejournal.com]

God do I love this. Especially because they knew to make the rear ends of the Red Leicesters glow with whatever motive power they're using. What the hell would that be, cheese fusion? Pepper ions? What exactly does propel a Red Leicester through space? Maybe they just slingshotted* their way around Saturn.

Couldn't be funnier.


_____
*'Slingshotted' is a verb if I say it is.

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

yeah, ewwww.

Slingshotted is totally a verb

[flipping-hades.livejournal.com]

I really don't know whether to be horrified or awesomeated (totally making that a word too).

I think they're powered by pepper fission -- the key is "cracked pepper". Cracking the pepper releases the energy, propelling the chese to its destiny!

Awesomated, please

[jactitation.livejournal.com]

Drop the second "e" and I'm with you.

Re: Awesomated, please

[flipping-hades.livejournal.com]

So amended!

[loolica.livejournal.com]

wow. i. hm.

ok. first, clearly there is a shortage of talent at the crossroads of cheese and graphic design and perhaps it is at this junction that i should stake my claim.

second. why so angry weird cheese dudes?

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

Awesome.

[liveavatar.livejournal.com]

Now they look like angry meat Twinkies. From space!

Not that that's a bad thing.

[queen-beeanna.livejournal.com]

Angry Meat Twinkies From Space.

...wanna start a band?

[liveavatar.livejournal.com]

I literally woke up thinking about that very thing.

[queen-beeanna.livejournal.com]

"I literally woke up thinking about that very thing."

You've seen the light! We gotta get the band back together!

[winsey.livejournal.com]

Even if red leicester was good, that nonsensical concocation would be vile. It looks like the inside of a butterfinger.

[warsop.livejournal.com]

A Kit-Kat, I think. They've been doing weird combinations, so I can see them doing something red with a white filling.

uh, nice

[citizenx.livejournal.com]

That reminds me of this cheese I've been seeing at the grocery store lately. It's a combination of some orange and yellow so that it looks like a smiley face on the end. You can make your kids happy by putting smiley faces in their sandwiches, apparently.

I'd prefer good cheese, but maybe that's just me.

Re: uh, nice

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

Ackkkkkk! Charlie Cheese! That crap isn't cheap either.

It is a good tool for taking UK sales reps down a peg though. Whenever they start putting down the good ol' USA cheesemakers I bring up Charlie. Never fails to shut them up.

Vileness!

[woolly.livejournal.com]

On behalf of England I apologise. Those comedy logs look as wholesome as the nightmarish stringy stuff cropping up in TV ads lately.

Tomorrow I'll have to go by the posh shop for Montgomery's Cheddar or equivalent antidote. When you visit London, which cheese shops are on your hitlist, or is that too much of a busman's holiday?

Re: Vileness!

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

don't worry, I won't hold it against you!

last time I was in England I got a tour of the Neal's Yard aging rooms. Next time I hope to visit some cheesemakers. Montgomery's cheddar ould be on top of my list.