Cheese Conference: a dull panel and unseen art

[gordonzola]

My next panel was "The Structure of Specialty Food Pricing" where I didn’t learn a thing. I swear I heard the retailer on the panel say that his store had carpeted aisles but no one else I asked remember him saying it. Maybe it was my imagination. *

I hoped to get more insight on how cheesemakers price their specialty cheeses because I already know what retailers and distributors do. Unfortunately it was more of a list of overhead costs by all the panelists, not a line item with expenses and a justification for their percentage mark-up. The first conference I went to, back when there was a separate cheesemaker day, people were much more forthcoming with what could be considered proprietary information. I don’t blame ‘em really. A cheesemaker giving out that info now that the conference is bigger will have it used against them by certain chains.

Reminding me the ways I don’t belong at the conference, the retailer also said, when discussing his expenses, "We all own homes so we know about mortgages, insurance…"

I blew off the afternoon session about "Lessons from Craft Beer" because it seemed like a rehash of a panels I saw at The Sonoma Cheese conference the last two years. Suffice it to say that the hand made cheese biz is similar to the craft brewery business in 1985. And I do like the pairing of cheese and beer better than wine and beer any day of the week. Brewers are rarely snotty, for one reason.

The Portland Art Museum hosted the second largest schmooze-fest of the conference that night. I was acutely aware of this since I had delivered 24 cases of beer there earlier in the day. I set about trying to drink as much of it as I could while chatting with cheese folks. I was starved so I settled in at a table with a plate of hors d’ouevers and Little Sister. We quickly became a magnet for unaligned people looking for a safe haven. We befriended a lonely-looking cheese guy who told us about his surprisingly large dairy farm in the Midwest. He kept inviting us to come for a visit and stay in their guest house. Of course, when I got his card the company logo had a huge cross as part of the logo. I looked disappointedly at it while he simultaneously looked dismayed at my card which read "Rainbow Grocery Cooperative" which told him I was either a homo or a hippie communist.

Now it’s not like I don’t carry a cheese made by Christians or right-wingers. I have a fairly realistic idea of who lives in rural areas and they’re certainly not all hippie back to the land folks. A couple of Central Valley cheesemakers had bible verses in their logo until someone with a sense of the Bay Area market probably told them it would hurt their sales. These things can lead to awkward silences.

At some point a woman from Oakland wandered up and was shocked that my store paid for my attendance at such an expensive schmoozefest not connected specifically to the natural foods world. Shhhh, don’t tell anyone.

I saw no art, despite being in a museum for three hours.


* Any Minneapolis folks know of an upscale chain that meets this description? It seems like a last minute substitution since he wasn’t in the program.

Comments

[masscooper.livejournal.com]

My aunt lives in Wyzata (rich suburb) and her grocery store has carpeted aisles.

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

that just seems so gross. I mean food spills every day in a grocery store. Yuck!

[shiloho3.livejournal.com]

Byerly's. I think the carpeted thing used to be their claim to fame, as if that made their stores more luxurious.
I don't shop there, but it wouldn't surprise me if they had a cheese counter.

carpet in the aisles

[coconuthead.livejournal.com]

Byerlys! I don't understand it, myself.

[twostepsfwd.livejournal.com]

cheese carpet!

(ew)

[loolica.livejournal.com]

carp in the aisles?
carpathian aisles?
carpet and tiles?
carts in the aisles?
no carts in the aisles?

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

"we need a cleanup in the fish section. We have carp in the aisles."

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

oh, and Carpathian Aisles: Beware of Vampires

[walktheplank.livejournal.com]

Definitely Byerly's. I used to work there, back in high school.

[ivorjawa.livejournal.com]

Kowalski's even more than Byerly's.

[amandaruth2001.livejournal.com]

Kowalski's has the good cheese, yes. Byerly's (with the carpet) and Lund's (without) are now owned by the same company and seem to carry pretty similar goods, and plenty of fancy cheeses, too, but I don't think they have the Roomano Kowalski's carries, which is currently my favorite cheese. I'm sure you were wondering.

Someone help me here, though - Byerly's doesn't have carpet in the meat section, right? In the rest of the store, I imagine it's not too much trouble. Perhaps fewer jelly jars shatter when they hit carpet as opposed to tile. It's amazing how quiet the store feels. I mostly hate shopping there, but I enjoy the quiet.

[kest]

your business card exchange is hilarious. you would think cheese love would transcend these petty cultural differences.

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

if the cheese was better it would...

[thisisthenow.livejournal.com]

Isn't there enough love for everyone under God's cheese rainbow? Even the right wingers, homos and hippies?

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

haha. Like I said, I carry plenty of Christian cheese. No one's checking beliefs by the slice, but incorporating it into the logo takes it up a level.

[lapsed.livejournal.com]

Wait, I thought the rainbow in Rainbow Grocery was a symbol of God's love for mankind? Do I need to find a new bulk aisle to graze my flock?

[elusis.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I think it refers to how God promised to never again destroy the world with cheese... or something.