Urban grocery stories

[gordonzola]

In years past, we have often gone to co-op conferences where it was clear that some of the things we have to account for as a large urban grocery store are different from smaller town co-ops.* An incident yesterday sums it up.

A co-worker noticed someone who looked a little crazy** acting strangely upon entering the store. He had a big Macy's bag with them which is a good sign of a bad shoplifter. Co-worker was keeping an eye on him and I guess he noticed because he came up to her and opened his bag. "Look!" he snarled from his toothless mouth.

She assumed he was just showing her an empty bag to prove his innocence so she was all, "it's fine"

Then he snarled louder "LOOK!"

She looked. He was carrying four rats with him. She started screaming "Get out! Get out! Get out!" Seemingly satisfied, he wandered towards the exit.

Later that day I was relaying this story to Formaldhyde and he asked, "Were the rats alive or dead?" I had assumed alive and hadn't even thought to ask. He had assumed dead.*** I had to call my co-worker at home. "The rats… were they alive or dead?"

"Alive. Chocolate brown. They looked like pets. Uh, did you really call me at home just to ask me that?"

"Of course," I said. Oral history is the life blood of any cooperative.



*I could have sworn I wrote about the anti-oppression workshop I went to where someone tearfully spoke about a customer saying meanly, "Do you have to be a dyke to shop here or what?" and how all my co-workers laughed. But I can't find it. Anyone remember that anecdote or should I tell it again?

**Our standard of "crazy" is pretty high. Just take my word for it here.

***[Poll #1090300]

Comments

[angiereedgarner.livejournal.com]

It makes a certain sense to take one's pet rats cheese shopping. Props for reuse/recycling and avoiding those tacky Paris Hiltonesque mini dog carriers?

[charmenders.livejournal.com]

Being a linguistics student, I thought the rats story was a Theory of Mind test-- asking us what your co-worker thought when she looked inside the Macy bag!

[magpiesf.livejournal.com]

when i first read that, i thought "theyre alive!" but now that ive read the poll, all i can think about is that subhumans song.

[liveavatar.livejournal.com]

I wonder what the LJ rat-fancier communities would think of this story. Except for the "Look!" aspect, which reminds me of the childhood eating game, my first assumption was that this is a heartwarming story of "you find your friends where you can."

[gwenzilla.livejournal.com]

why on earth would anyone carry around a bag of DEAD RATS?
obviously alive.

[thisisthenow.livejournal.com]

So hideous. You may or may not recall that a student left a dead rat in my cart a few years back. Alive or dead, they're awful.

[mazette.livejournal.com]

i actually wondered why your co-worker would start screaming at the person to get out. it seems excessive.
rats are nice if yr nice to them. i hope they were happy with their toothless friend.

i'd rather see rats in rainbow then some of those complacent, monied shoppers.

Rats are people too

[(Anonymous)]

I'm with the last commenter. I can't believe you would kick someone out just for bringing rats in the store. You people have really sold out.

OFFTHEPIGSFUCKSHITUPSTICKITTOTHEMAN!!!!!!

[serazin.livejournal.com]

Oops! That was me. And I stand strongly behind my Pro-Rats position!

re: service rat scenario

[(Anonymous)]

sir;

in the movie of this incident in my mind, the only thing missing from the lively dialogue with your friends above is - as your associate looks in the bag, her face is illuminated by a golden glow, as in when the briefcase is opened in "pulp fiction", or when the bag is opened in that fine robert aldrich movie, "kiss me deadly".

sincerely,
a fugitive from the laughing house

[loolica.livejournal.com]

For me, dead rat is definitely a sub-category of rat. And the DEAD part would probably be the thing I would emphasize in the story, so I didn't go to dead at all. I used to see people with rats in pockets or hoods or around their necks or whatever on the bus and in stores in Vancouver. Never in a grocery store or restaurant, thank dog.

[wolfknuckles.livejournal.com]

until you told us, they were shroedinger's rats.