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gordonzola ([personal profile] gordonzola) wrote2008-08-12 08:57 am
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ACS 2008: My panel

I spent a lot of time at the American Cheese Society conference stressed out about the panel I was moderating. I was stressed for a few reasons. 1. I proposed my panel and organized it 2. As I confessed a few weeks ago, public speaking scares me and 3. Right before we left town I got an e-mail saying 175 people had already pre-registered for it.

It should be noted that these are 175 cheese professionals so it’s not like I could bullshit like I do behind the cheese counter. (Joke!) Plus that email freaked my panel out. I heard from all of them within a couple hours of it going out. We scheduled an extra meeting at the hotel bar to keep everyone’s nerves at bay.

Our panel topic was “Keeping it Fresh: Harm Reduction for Cheese at Retail”.* I must admit that I used the phrase harm reduction as a joke and even as I thought it was a good metaphor I didn’t expect it to actually appear in the program titled that way. Now I feel all subversive. Today: maintaining humidity in the walk-in. Tomorrow: handing out needles in the park.

The panel went great. Juliana from the Pasta Shop,** Carlos from Zingerman’s, and Helder from Zuercher (a cheese distributor from Chicago) were all as nervous as I was but they didn’t show it. People seemed really pleased by the presentations especially after last year’s panel on affinage (cheese aging) that basically answered every question with “ You need to buy another cooler”.

Our message was fairly clear: except for a small handful of stores in the US, affinage is not for retailers. In fact, a few minutes into the panel I made the word “caaaaaaaaav” the word of the day ala Pee-Wee’s Playhouse. Whenever a panelist or audience member said “caaaaaaaaav” everyone waved their arms and yelled. A room full of cheese professionals actually did this! Well, most of them anyways.

I haven’t gotten my evaluations yet, but I think most people walked away happy. Ricki Carroll, The Cheese Queen, someone I’ve always admired for not only being a founder of the ACS*** but for her politics got up at the end and thanked the panel for actually sharing information saying this was the panel she’d been waiting years to see at ACS and she now had more respect for retailers.

I was so exhausted that, even though it wasn’t quite noon, I had to go to the bar and skip the next session.




*The catalogue description: “Retailers who are truly set up to do affinage are few and far between, no matter what we may tell the customer. How do we maintain the integrity of the cheese we sell, factoring in the equipment we have available? Since many of us do not have extra room or extra money to buy a different cooler for every type of cheese, how can we make sure that the cheese we sell is of the best possible quality? How do we manage the cheese that arrives with defects or the cheese that we receive too young? Panelists will share tips, improvised strategies and practical solutions to handling problem and/or needy cheeses including detailing their attempts to create different climates in the same cooler.”

**I should probably link to the Pasta Shop site but Juliana’s mom made this personal site for her. Isn’t it cute?

***At the opening ceremony there was a video (made by The Cheese Chick about the history of the ACS and Ricki is filmed in her “Stop bitching, Start a revolution” tank top. Awwwwww.

[identity profile] und1sk0.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 04:54 pm (UTC)(link)
Gordon, the Bunny Colvin of the cheese world.

[identity profile] gordonzola.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 10:32 pm (UTC)(link)
hahahaha. I'll put that on my next business card.

[identity profile] redshrike.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 05:21 pm (UTC)(link)
yay all around. sounds like a smashing success; and you, buddy, gave me my first laugh of the day. (getting the room to waved their arms and yell on cue: WINNING.) thank you.

Beer is the answer to everything

[identity profile] sheanadavis.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 05:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Nice job!
Of course a beer always helps the nerves!
See you soon and feel better sooner!
Sheana

[identity profile] sadie-sabot.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 05:23 pm (UTC)(link)
hey, that's awesome! good workl!

[identity profile] loolica.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 05:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Today: maintaining humidity in the walk-in. Tomorrow: handing out needles in the park.

Wait. Are you telling me there's some way to get cheese intravenously? Genius!

[identity profile] liveavatar.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 05:42 pm (UTC)(link)
It warms my heart to know that your fellow cheese professionals are willing to descend to the level of Peewee's Playhouse with you.

Buy another cooler...

[identity profile] foodpoisoningsf.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 06:09 pm (UTC)(link)
A few years ago I was in Bordeaux and stumbled across the Jean d'Alos' shop. I started chatting with a charming but flinty Frenchwoman and mentioned that I knew Peggy and Sue at Cowgirl. Turns out it was Mme. D'Alos and she took me on a tour of their various ripening rooms- which were in fact limestone caves excavated centuries ago for wine merchants, scrubbed down and outfitted with electronic monitoring devices. One more reason to love France.

Re: Buy another cooler...

[identity profile] gordonzola.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 10:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Jean d'Alos was brought up as an example of real affinage. That sounds awesome!

[identity profile] prof-southbay.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 06:44 pm (UTC)(link)
I love the "caaaaaaaav" bit. Hilarious. I'm glad it all went well.

[identity profile] rockgeisha.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 08:44 pm (UTC)(link)
"Cheese educator" sounds like the best job ever. Of course, I'm picturing it like this (http://i35.tinypic.com/2ahyt1j.jpg).

[identity profile] gordonzola.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 11:52 pm (UTC)(link)
haha nice!

"Problem and/or needy cheeses"

[identity profile] effluvia.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 08:50 pm (UTC)(link)
I suddenly feel a renewed kinship with cheese, especially the more cantankerous ones.

[identity profile] nahmo.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 11:43 pm (UTC)(link)
you know you've ruined... ok, enhanced the word "cave" for me forever! :D

we had a presentation with AFI for the rest of our company's cheese mongers after we got back... and everytime the dude who gave the class said "cahv," the three of us who went to ACS would look at eachother, wave our hands, and mouth screams lol

but honestly, your panel was the most informative and one of the most entertaining experiences of the whole conference. i took a ton away from that talk. you all rocked like slayer.

[identity profile] gordonzola.livejournal.com 2008-08-12 11:47 pm (UTC)(link)
oh man, I wanted to rock like Death Angel!


hahaha. Thanks. Meeting you was a highlight of the trip.

Bitching

[identity profile] nunofthat.livejournal.com 2008-08-13 01:38 am (UTC)(link)
I fucking hate Zendik farm.

Re: Bitching

[identity profile] gordonzola.livejournal.com 2008-08-13 02:04 am (UTC)(link)
I didn't know they were still around.

BUSH IS A BLOODTHIRSTY WARPIG!

Re: Bitching

[identity profile] nunofthat.livejournal.com 2008-08-13 02:19 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I was living in Asheville when they used to be HQed there. Hate hate hate. How can I hate "a revolutionary tribe of Warrior Artists designing a brave new culture"? Let me count the ways.

Also, I might call you sometime to get filled in on some local co-op drama.

[identity profile] soalivesofree.livejournal.com 2008-08-13 11:54 pm (UTC)(link)
You referenced Pee-Wee's Playhouse. I love you.

Also, you are my hero for speaking in public in front of 175 people. I did a panel a few months back in front of, like, an eighth of that, and I spent the first two minutes of speaking trying not to hyperventilate.