Visitors bring out the angst
Sep. 2nd, 2003 12:10 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
So
reddawn came to town to drink and watch videos. I was happy to meet her since she was one of my first LJ "Friends". Of course I thought she’d be older since her user name is "Red Dawn".* We met up at Doctor Bombay’s in honor of
bornbent who like Reddawn is from Detroit (though Red Dawn Lives in Chicago now). I bought a book on the way over because I knew that she was coming over with
socialretard and
slipkid and I figured they’d be late.
Actually, I just knew it would take me a lot less time to get to the bar since I was already out. Some old SF friends who’d moved to LA were up for the day and we’d been eating dinner and perusing Castro stores for a bear paw belt buckle. I picked up a hanky code guide because I hadn’t had one in awhile. I’d forgotten all about flagging mosquito netting if you’re into outdoor sex. Hott.
When I grabbed a booth with my Jim Thompson novel Doc Bom’s was a punk bar. An Emptyish punk bar, but definitely a punk bar. Punk music, surly counter punks, cute bartender with dyed hair and raccoon-eyed make-up, etc. Somehow by the time I left, 3-4 rounds later, it had transformed into a yuppie bar playing lite-techno and filled with khakied going-out-on-the-town-so-I’ll-put-on-too-much-aftershave people. If this was a metaphor for the Mission it would seem a little too heavy-handed. But I swear it’s true.
About five chapters into the book, the LiveJournalers showed up. Luckily, I was drinking slowly so I wouldn’t be an incoherent jerk by the time I met Red Dawn for the first time. Those first impressions are so important after all. I even wore my leather jacket so she’d feel more at home. Of course, my impression of Chicago punks is gleaned only from Screeching Weasel records.
We drank and discussed tattoos, how cold SF is, how hot her migrant labor "internship" in the desert will be, and how much we exaggerate in our Live Journals. At one point her and Social Retard were discussing water sports and then both excused themselves to go to the bathroom at the same time. But since I would never exaggerate myself, you’ll have to ask them the rest of the story.
Red Dawn and her boy are thinking of moving to SF with him teaching in the public schools.** After a disastrous convincing of my (now former) best friend to move here 12 years ago, I have vowed to not try and convince anyone to move to SF. You really have to want to live in this city to be here.
I don’t know if it’s possible not to have a love/hate relationship with the city you’ve lived in for a number of years, but I know it’s not possible in SF unless you have an unlimited supply of money. Eviction worries, the space crunch, and the cost of living can make it a hard place to set down roots. Or to even keep the roots you do have from being strangled from trying to grow in too small a planter box.
The LA friends that I spent the early part of the evening with are part of the semi-depressing story. They moved down to help care for the dying father of the San Ho part of the couple. It was certainly just a temporary move. But they ended up settling, buying a house, and creating a new community for themselves and have no plans to move back up. Even though I’m happy for them, I feel my Bay Area Pride hurt by defections like this, as well as feeling like I need to consider whether I’m being dumb by staying.
But this is home for me and I can’t imagine wanting to live anywhere else. It feels right in a way I can’t explain, and I can’t imagine not feeling like an outsider forever anywhere else I’d think of moving. Moving away would also make me feel like a lot of the last 15 years was somehow wasted. Plus I’d miss the fog and my job. Sigh.
(San Francisco angst to be continued at a later date…)
*WOLVERINES!
**With the yearly trauma of layoffs in the SFUSD this sounds like a strange idea to me, even though I’d like to say otherwise. SF-based opinions anyone?
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Actually, I just knew it would take me a lot less time to get to the bar since I was already out. Some old SF friends who’d moved to LA were up for the day and we’d been eating dinner and perusing Castro stores for a bear paw belt buckle. I picked up a hanky code guide because I hadn’t had one in awhile. I’d forgotten all about flagging mosquito netting if you’re into outdoor sex. Hott.
When I grabbed a booth with my Jim Thompson novel Doc Bom’s was a punk bar. An Emptyish punk bar, but definitely a punk bar. Punk music, surly counter punks, cute bartender with dyed hair and raccoon-eyed make-up, etc. Somehow by the time I left, 3-4 rounds later, it had transformed into a yuppie bar playing lite-techno and filled with khakied going-out-on-the-town-so-I’ll-put-on-too-much-aftershave people. If this was a metaphor for the Mission it would seem a little too heavy-handed. But I swear it’s true.
About five chapters into the book, the LiveJournalers showed up. Luckily, I was drinking slowly so I wouldn’t be an incoherent jerk by the time I met Red Dawn for the first time. Those first impressions are so important after all. I even wore my leather jacket so she’d feel more at home. Of course, my impression of Chicago punks is gleaned only from Screeching Weasel records.
We drank and discussed tattoos, how cold SF is, how hot her migrant labor "internship" in the desert will be, and how much we exaggerate in our Live Journals. At one point her and Social Retard were discussing water sports and then both excused themselves to go to the bathroom at the same time. But since I would never exaggerate myself, you’ll have to ask them the rest of the story.
Red Dawn and her boy are thinking of moving to SF with him teaching in the public schools.** After a disastrous convincing of my (now former) best friend to move here 12 years ago, I have vowed to not try and convince anyone to move to SF. You really have to want to live in this city to be here.
I don’t know if it’s possible not to have a love/hate relationship with the city you’ve lived in for a number of years, but I know it’s not possible in SF unless you have an unlimited supply of money. Eviction worries, the space crunch, and the cost of living can make it a hard place to set down roots. Or to even keep the roots you do have from being strangled from trying to grow in too small a planter box.
The LA friends that I spent the early part of the evening with are part of the semi-depressing story. They moved down to help care for the dying father of the San Ho part of the couple. It was certainly just a temporary move. But they ended up settling, buying a house, and creating a new community for themselves and have no plans to move back up. Even though I’m happy for them, I feel my Bay Area Pride hurt by defections like this, as well as feeling like I need to consider whether I’m being dumb by staying.
But this is home for me and I can’t imagine wanting to live anywhere else. It feels right in a way I can’t explain, and I can’t imagine not feeling like an outsider forever anywhere else I’d think of moving. Moving away would also make me feel like a lot of the last 15 years was somehow wasted. Plus I’d miss the fog and my job. Sigh.
(San Francisco angst to be continued at a later date…)
*WOLVERINES!
**With the yearly trauma of layoffs in the SFUSD this sounds like a strange idea to me, even though I’d like to say otherwise. SF-based opinions anyone?
no subject
Date: 2003-09-02 06:32 pm (UTC)But I am learning too that a lot of people in Portland suck. I am not happy with a lot of the iced chai sipping new age assholes that are rampant here. And the PBR mesh hat wearing hipsters are annoying too. Oh well, every city on earth has assholes in it.
no subject
Date: 2003-09-03 02:11 pm (UTC)