Haven't we done this before? (Memories from 1991)

[gordonzola]

I had intense flashbacks all day on Thursday and Friday during the protests. Some things were so similar to 1991 that I would actually have moments of confusion. Weird. Maybe I had some sort of demonstration PTSD that lay dormant until now.

When the Thursday post-5PM march headed towards the Bay Bridge it took the exact same route we took in 1991 during the first Gulf War. Walking towards the Fremont St. on-ramp back then, the plan, in my mind at least, was actually to march all the way across the bridge and I secretly worried whether or not we could even make it if we tried. That’s a long walk. But I was 12 years younger back then and fully fueled by adrenaline and outrage.

On that march, a group of people surprised the cops by running up the hill on the side of the ramp towards the freeway. The cops were confused and out-flanked. The main body of the march then surged towards the ramp. It was crazy walking on the bridge that I had driven over my whole life. What a view! The crowd was momentarily alone and though tense, there was a moment to breathe. I picked up a loose lane reflector. Not to throw at the cops, but as a souvenir.* It was carnival-like for a few minutes. Even the "Arrest Stephen King for the murder of John Lennon!" guy was up there with us.

Then I looked down at the 200 ft. drop to the South of Market pavement, saw the cops moving in to force us into the guardrails and got the fuck out of there.

The next night I was near the front of the march and with friends. We surged and made it onto a different bridge on ramp with about 50 people before the police closed ranks behind us. "Oh shit," was all I could think. The cops have been embarrassed and there will be no witnesses when they arrest us: one of the most unsafe demonstration situations to be in.

But it was a thin wall of cops and after a moment’s hesitation, the crowd rushed them, forcing them to retreat. We had taken the bridge. Again.

Leaving the on ramp that night, the first thing I saw was a burning cop car with a bunch of mohawked and masked punks dancing around it. After warming myself a bit, I thought, "Hey, this might blow up," and got away before it did. This inspired the wonderful Rhetoric Factory slogan, "Let a burning cop car light up your night" that were passed out for free then next night.

But it wasn’t just the intense moments that were coming back to me. When I walked by sites of old battles, I could see how they looked in those days. The trashed Greyhound Station under the highway,** the boarded up military recruiting station, fountains dyed to look like flowing blood etc. I wish I had kept a diary back then

In 1991 I had the energy to skip work for a week and go to the two demos a day, every day, marching miles and miles through the streets and well into the night. The energy on the streets is very similar in 2003.

But I can’t say I can quite match that myself these days. In fact, I’ve felt severe anxiety many times during this week’s activities which is very strange for me. My old friends can attest that I almost never get crowd panic or claustrophobia at demos. Putting oneself in a stressful situation is always difficult, but I’m still trying to figure out where this panic and urge to escape is coming from. Being older? Not having jactitation around? Having a slightly more developed political analysis, and hopefully less naiveté, than a dozen years ago? Flashbacks bringing up too many old memories at once?

I haven’t figured it out. But it’s not just the stupid chants like usual.



* I still have it. Along with a piece of wood from the "shanty town" we built to protest apartheid that got demolished on my birthday in 1987. I only wish I could have gotten Mayor Jordan’s penny loafer which was liberated at an ACT UP protest I attended. I would open a museum.

** Greyhound drivers were on strike during the first Gulf War.

Comments

[cherrifying.livejournal.com]

I've never seen the "arrest Stephen King for the murder of John Lennon" guy. Does he hang out with the "Selenium cures AIDS" guy? I love that we have Johnny Onenote nutbags here who become famous in their own nutty rights.

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

I haven't seen the Stephen King guy for years but he used to be at every demo. He had a big picture of Stephen King and Mark David Chapman looking very similar that he'd wear on his sandwich board. The Selenium guy is much, much worse. More shrill, no hook, you know?

[tristn.livejournal.com]

The next night I was near the front of the march and with friends. We surged and made it onto a different bridge on ramp with about 50 people before the police closed ranks behind us.

Oh my god you were in that group. I was listening on the indybay radio station play by play when that was happening. That was intense.

I'm actually too stressed out by all fighting with the cops going on. I need more aim and less violent tension to what ever resistance I'm doing. I think a better goal of the movement would be to more dirctly target the industrys here in the bay that directly contribute to the war. It seams important to me to try and get some of the more moderate protesters that only go to the weekend organized marches to be more aware of where they make and spend and invest there money and try to get them to change all that if they want to have more conviction about their beliefs to stop this or future wars.

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

Oh my god you were in that group. I was listening on the indybay radio station play by play when that was happening. That was intense.


no, no. That was in 1991, not last week. and I agree about who to target. however, not on a consumer level. We don't have enough money to affect the real war mongers.

[mallorys-camera.livejournal.com]

I support what you're doing 110%, but you know it's a thin line you're walking in the sense that all public action is a propaganda campaign. The end to the war will not be decided by us (too small a fraction) but by those commuters, sitting in stalled traffic on the bridge approach, waiting to go home. They're our constituency. And I suspect it's counter-productive to piss them off too much.

[gordonzola.livejournal.com]

The actions yesterday (which I missed) focused on corporations benefiting from/pushing for the war. I agree that those are much better targets. See this article: "Yoga for Peace has been out here every day. They are very nice, and they are extremely limber.

[jactitation.livejournal.com]

Or is it our age? I am fascinated by the discussions here (the capital of Germany) of the problems with an anti-US feeling as a cover for their own problems, particularly the way in which the old former East activists are criticized for trotting out their anti "imperialist" banners--this is seen as less analysis of US action (which is of course imperialist) as a refusal to deal with Germanys own past (forgive my lack of apostrophes; the keyboard here does not seem to translate well). I cannot wait to talk with you about this. Wanna go to work late on Thursday so we can talk from about 4 am when I am sure I will wake up until the afternoon?

I am, however, still so proud of you and all other SFers for putting SF on the international map of antiwar action. YOU FUCKING ROCK!!! And I look forward to rocking with you all again, cranky, critical of all around us, and on the streets.